We had another thunderstorm whilst we were at work last night, and poor Roger Poopy has got so frightened of the bangs and flashes that he won’t go out into the scary garden any more.
He was already in a state about it after the last thunderstorm, but this one has just about defeated his little poopy-courage. Even when we are with him in daylight he doesn’t want to know, he stands trembling in the doorway until somebody shoves him through the door, and if we are going somewhere he dashes through the garden at top speed as if Slenderman were hiding under the blackcurrant bush. When he gets to the other end if he can’t immediately get out of the Scary Garden and away into the road he dashes straight back into the house again.
This is tiresome because of not being able to explain that actually there is nothing in the garden. When it was Oliver and Slenderman hiding outside his bedroom on the stairs I was able to sit him down and explain that it was entirely his own fault for watching unsuitable rubbish on YouTube, and actually Slenderman was not on the stairs at all, but underneath his bed.
We are feeling very proud of Oliver today, because we had an email from school this morning telling us that he has been elected to the School Council. We had seen a video of the hustings, with a few highlights, and I have been anxious about it ever since. Anyway, he has won the election, which is more than I ever managed during my brief and utterly undistinguished political career. I am very pleased indeed and have secretly started composing my interview for the Daily Mail for the day after he becomes Prime Minister and moves into Downing Street.
Number Two Daughter thought that I might be getting a bit ahead of myself, but actually I am feeling jolly pleased with all of them at the moment.
Number One Daughter has just been awarded something called Sporting Colours by the Army. I don’t know what Sporting Colours are, when I looked it up on Google it seems that they present you with a tie with an impressive looking crest on it. She doesn’t wear ties by much so I wonder if she could ask them to swap it for a pretty scarf or a handbag or something that she might get some wear out of.
Not to be left behind, Number Two Daughter is alternating between trying to earn enough cash to finance her next adventure in Canada for which she leaves in a few weeks, and going to the gym in order to become fit. She is in a competition next month, and has been on a diet and has lost just over three stones. I think that is a very lot, she put it on whilst living the life of plenty in Japan last year, but it has all gone now. I am very impressed, given that I have never been in a successful diet in my life, or even an unsuccessful one, come to that.
Lucy is busy doing her GCSEs which sounds like a doddle compared to her summer spent running up and down the stairs in the Chinese restaurant. She thoughtfully sent me an email this morning reminding me that it was an exeat weekend and I needed to come and collect her tomorrow.
In fact I hadn’t forgotten, partly because Nan rang me up yesterday and reminded me, I am so grateful for all the kind people in my life.
Hence we are at work tonight trying to scrape together some cash to go and collect them all in the morning. Mark has spent the day at the farm taking his taxi to bits and rebuilding it. I went over in the afternoon to wash up his breakfast plates and cook him some lunch. I considered feeling oppressed about this, but decided not to bother as if I were liberated I would have had to mend the taxi, which I certainly didn’t fancy.
Instead I have cleaned the children’s rooms ready for their imminent arrival. I scrubbed the pan rack and hung up the new pans which look splendid, as you can see. Then I hoovered and tidied up, and lit a candle to the kindly benevolent Gods, who have been so generous with the children even if they have been scaring the poopy.
I am most grateful for their largesse to inefficient but importunate mothers.
