There is a splendid Afternoon Play on Radio Four at the moment, all about a gruff-voiced Manchester policeman trying to work out who has done some murders

It has been serialised over several days. Because of lack of personal organisation I have missed quite a bit, and so I am not at all sure what is going on, but I have been enjoying it very much anyway. I think that somebody else has been murdered in the episode I missed on Friday, but I am not quite sure who, and we, the listeners, are beginning to hope that the gruff-voiced policeman might get back with his wife eventually. It is jolly good and when it eventually comes on to the website I will listen to it in its entirety.

I know there is a thing called an iPlayer which enables this activity, but I have had so many threats from the government lately about my lack of a television licence that I am a bit concerned in case an iPlayer turns out to be on the list of things that unlicensed people are Not Allowed to do.

I have not got a television licence because we have not got a television, just so you know, not because I am a secret criminal. It is difficult to convince the government of this, especially since we do have a watchable screen. It is not tuned in to anything except Netflix, however, and we almost never watch that.

I wish we had more time to watch things. I am very interested to find out what happens next in A Game Of Thrones, since we have only got as far as Series Five. We have also watched the first series of something called The Crown. I would like to watch the second series of this, but it is not a cliff hanger in quite the same way, because I know what happens. She grows up and sacks her underwear fitter.

I do like to listen to the radio, though. Listening to stories of murder and dark suspicion make afternoon baking much more entertaining. This morning I was captivated by a truly dreadful story about an actual real-live woman from Rotherham who would have liked to have a boyfriend but discovered that almost everybody she ever met was only inclined to ply her with drugs and then take advantage of her. At least, that was what she thought was happening although found it hard to be sure because of the drugs. She thought this because of going out for a date one evening and waking up in Wigan.

In the end the producers had clearly decided to go for a note of optimism to conclude, because she managed to get a job in a care home and thought that one day she might be able to afford a holiday in Tenerife.

It was like listening to a real live car accident, unspeakably horrible but impossible to tear oneself away. I was so enchanted I sat down at the table in order to listen without disturbing myself.

I am very glad I am not living in a council house in Rotherham without any money. Also I am glad that I am married to Mark, who does not show any inclination to drug me and take me to Wigan.

In fact he is not taking me anywhere at the moment, because of lack of funding and time. He had to rush off to work this morning again, and I unloaded the firewood out of the trailer. This took ages, but I did not at all mind, because now we have got every shed full of wood, and we will be able to stay warm for all of the worst of the weather now. Not having to pay money for heating is enormously helpful, it is one of the reasons that we can do other nice things, like live in Windermere and not Rotherham.

My life is good.

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