I have had an email from Cambridge asking me if I can write an article for their magazine for post-graduates, on the strength of what they very flatteringly described as my Brilliant Speech a couple of weeks ago.
I am just dropping that into the conversation in passing, not for any reasons of showing off or anything, of course I would never dream of doing such a thing, and indeed in the interests of modesty I have barely talked about it all in these pages. Well, perhaps you don’t know, because I can’t remember if I mentioned it, but I had to make a speech in Cambridge, at the university, where as it happens I am doing a Master’s’s’ degree, a couple of weeks ago, well, as it happened it was brilliant, and now I have been asked to write an article.
I have been thinking about this very hard, and it has become something of a challenge.
The thing is that I usually write very dull things, like Today I Did The Dusting, although not today, because actually I haven’t done any dusting today. This is not because the house doesn’t need it, because it does, and it is looking grey and fluffy in all of the corners again, but tomorrow is cleaning day, so this morning I got up and looked at the dust and thought To Hell With It, in a reckless kind of way, and watered the conservatory instead. The dust can jolly well wait until tomorrow, I am just that wild and carefree type of woman.
The problem is that I do not think Cambridge will want a dull article, and may not even be interested in dusting at all. I am going to have to think of something brilliantly entertaining to say, so it is a good job I am wild and carefree. Obviously they want me to write about being a student, so it is no good writing about any of the wild things I have done, like when I went paddling in the freezing sea up in Scotland the other day, so I am going to have to think about something which is both exciting and appropriately academic. This is making me think so hard I noticed this afternoon that I was accidentally scowling all the time, which is going to make my wrinkles worse if I am not careful.
I will have to think carefully. I will keep you posted.
Also I am pleased to announce that we have Lucy at home, and she has brought the autumn chill with her. I am in the taxi now, and it is absolutely freezing, the season of darkness is upon us. I am even wearing a scarf.
Her cats were moderately surprised to see her, and one of them even came up to inspect her just to be certain they were not mistaken, but they accepted her presence almost instantly and then returned to their usual feral occupations in the flower beds.
Roger Poopy, on the other hand, was so pleased to see her we thought he might faint from the excitement. He barked and leaped in the air and cried with delight, and was so upset when she cruelly abandoned him to visit the bathroom that he sat outside it with his nose pressed to the door, making forlorn little whimpering noises, whilst everybody else shouted For Goodness’ Sake, Roger, up the stairs. When she came out he was so joyfully relieved that she had to go through the whole dog-greeting process all over again.
He is determined not to leave her alone now, in case she escapes again. For the next week, all of her activities will have to include a small dog, tagging anxiously along beside her, gazing adoringly with wide brown eyes.
Sometimes he can be a complete nuisance.
She did not arrive until late this afternoon, having been out last night with some fellow police officers having an early Hallowe’en celebration. They did something called a Fright Night, in which you go around a maze and people in scary costumes leap out from behind corners to make you jump.
This is a risky activity for performers when your customers have all been trained to respond to this sort of behaviour with fisticuffs and pepper spray.
Fortunately they had left their pepper spray in the police station, but she said there were a few close moments.
In consequence she had no intention of an early departure this morning, and I was almost ready to set off for work when she arrived, although obviously we all stopped what we were doing and sat cheerily in the conservatory with cups of tea for a while. This was supposed to be planning the things we need to achieve with our week together, but was actually a shirk. Oliver and Mark had been finishing off Oliver’s car for its MOT The Sequel tomorrow, and I had been doing everything else, which was mostly getting dinner ready.
I told you I was wild and carefree.
I am going to go away and think about being an exciting student.
Hmmm.
