We are back at work.
The last few days have been such a blur that when I thought about it this afternoon I realised that I did not have the first idea what day it was. In fact I was reasonably certain that it was probably Thursday, but in the end Oliver started getting ready for work and explained that I had lost a day somewhere.
I do not know how this happened.
As you know, we left Lucy’s house in the very middle of the night. It was a terrifically hot night, and we had had a busy, hot day. It is hot in the Lake District, but in the middle of a busy town it somehow feels even hotter, although the mighty Internet assured me that it wasn’t.
We left Lucy’s house in a state of happy tidiness, and Lucy feeling pleased with her world. She has spent today going to the tip and visiting the bank and generally doing everything necessary to put her whole world into a state of neat orderliness.
I like it when my world feels like that.
We had not had very many chances to sleep very much the night before, for all sorts of reasons, and last night we realised that we were aching with tiredness.
We drove as far as we could, and then slept for the two hours you are allowed to spend on service stations, then we drove a bit further and slept a bit more.
When we arrived home it was nine in the morning, and we were too tired even to yawn. We were heavy-eyed and weary, and moving seemed to hurt.
Still we made ourselves empty the camper van and leave it clean. It is horrible to know that it is squatting miserably in its parking space, grimy and unloved.
Then we staggered into the house and Mark emptied the dogs whilst I put everything away.
The dogs behaved like complete idiots, prancing about and not coming to heel. They have been being nuisances for Oliver whilst we have been away and they would not do a thing that they were being told. Mark dragged them back into the house and bellowed at them until they were all cowed and unhappy, so probably they will remember later on that being a clown in the road is Not Allowed.
Then we showered and crawled into bed.
I can hardly describe the joy of that shower.
We had not showered since we left, had not even cleaned our teeth. We had been hot, and busy, and dust was in my hair and under my fingernails.
I felt so unspeakably sticky and gritty that I could hardly stand to be inside my own skin.
We were so filthy that we did not even care that the water coming out of the taps had become inexplicably brown in our absence. This turned out to be a problem with the water board which resolved itself later on before we had even had chance to worry about it, so you do not need to be alarmed in our behalf. Some poor soul drowned in one of the lakes whilst we were away, so maybe it was that.
We scrubbed ourselves clean and then collapsed into clean sheets.
It was one of the nicest feelings in the world.
We were woken up briefly by an idiot who had left a telephone in my taxi and who wanted it back, so grumpily we left it on the doorstep for them to sort out for themselves, and then we slept and slept.
When we woke up it was three in the afternoon and still we knew we had not had enough sleep.
We were tired and gritty-eyed, but we knew we could function, so we struggled back into life and reconnected with Oliver.
Oliver has been running the show for the last few days, and apart from showing every inclination to club the dogs to death, has done it really very well. This was because despite countless emptying opportunities and free access to the garden through a permanently open door, they have still had accidents in the house. Probably not accidents. Probably On Purposes, to express their disapproval at being left behind.
We told them that nobody loved them and they lay hotly under the table and felt sorry for themselves.
Oliver told us then about his own terrible crisis in our absence.
His computer, his pride and joy and access to the outside world, has stopped working.
It is his everything, and it will not switch on any more.
He had not bothered us with it because we were busy, but now that we are home and have a little space, he could tell us about the full scale of the disaster.
Mark and Oliver know quite a lot about computers, on the scale of things, and they checked the battery, and for a build up of static, and the charger, and all sorts of other things, and eventually decided that the motherboard has fried.
The computer is finished.
We are going to have to solve that next.
We are going to have an evening at work and a little think. Funnily enough I feel entirely cheerful about it. I am quite sure that it will be completely fine.
The Lake District is hot and very busy. I am going to stop telling you things and drink tea in the sunshine in between customers.
I will update you tomorrow.
I have not got a photograph. Have one of the children in Blackpool.
