We are going away very soon, and you will not be surprised to hear that the consequence of this has been a massive, all-day-long flap.
I have flapped like a very flapping person.
Mark kindly volunteered to listen to me flapping, and in consequence has spent the whole day holding up ball gowns and smart dresses and day dresses and trying to decide whether or not I want him to agree that the jacket would look just fine with it.
Dearie me, it is so difficult.
I have tried on virtually everything that I own, because we have got to be very organised indeed.
There are some things that must go in a suitcase, because we are going to stay at Madingley Hall in Cambridge, and some other things that must be hung in the camper van, because we will be staying in the camper van whilst we are at Gordonstoun. There are also travelling days, beach-walking days, and stopping-at-Lucy’s-to-dump-the-dogs days. We are going to be away for a whole week.
We have not had a whole week’s holiday since 2011, when we had a brief interlude without school fees and went to Florida to visit Mickey Mouse. I pretended that this was for the children’s benefit but probably it was because I like sunshine and theme parks and fried chicken and policemen in sunglasses and alligators crossing the road occasionally. We rented a house with a swimming pool and had an amazing time, one day we will do it all again.
It was a very long time ago, and I am so excited about going away again that I have got gate fever. If we did not need the cash I would have set off this afternoon, but of course we can’t. We are going to work for the weekend and set off on Monday, like sensible grown-ups.
In any case I have not yet finished sorting our clothes out.
The whole clothes-sorting thing was made very happy indeed by the discovery that somebody who loves me very much had gone through all of our smart clothes, had all of them dry-cleaned, and then sprayed them with perfume and hung them in labelled bags with a few cedar wood balls in the bottom of each one to deter any hungry moths. Everything was beautifully pressed and fresh and so immaculate that I was almost reluctant to waste them on me.
It has not, of course, solved any of my clothing problems. The dresses that I want to wear are still at the tailor’s, and probably won’t be ready in time, and the exciting new shorts have not yet arrived. I have not even looked at Mark’s shorts yet, some of them will need ironing, and I spent half an hour this afternoon laying piles of underwear neatly on the bed and worrying about handkerchiefs.
After that we went to the camper van, where I discovered that the same thoughtful somebody has very kindly left all sorts of beautifully organised clothes, neatly folded or tidily hung, just ready for the sort of emergency where we might need to look beautiful in a hurry. There were even handkerchiefs, and piles of pressed T-shirts. I never press the T-shirts that we wear at home, I must have been feeling especially contented when I did it all. I had forgotten they were there. They have been there for ages.
I have not started properly worrying about food yet, that is tomorrow’s little worry. I had a nightmare the other night where somebody was insisting I ate lots of sticky cakes, and did not care in the least that I was trying to become thinner, so I had to try and run away, but they ran after me to try and bring me back.
Fortunately I woke up before I ate any.
Not that it mattered, because I have still not become any thinner. I have been eating celery and raw carrots for ages now. I made some biscuits today, because Oliver is coming home next week, and I did not eat a single one, not even a crumb. I have got to make ice cream tomorrow, for the same reason, and I don’t suppose I will eat any of that either. I have even started to wonder if it is the cottage cheese that is doing it, perhaps the pineapple is fattening.
I am on the taxi rank, albeit roundly, and it is a beautifully warm evening. The sky above the lake is pink and gold, and I am going to stop flapping. I have, in between writing in here, made myself a long list of Things To Do for tomorrow, and now I am going to stop thinking about them and enjoy the sunset.
I will see you on the other side
